It is important in any type of relationship you be open and honest about all things. This includes your likes and dislikes when it comes to things sexual. Many find it difficult to talk about anything sexual beyond the basics. While you may have an open-minded view about the use of sex toys and other sexual aids, your partner may not share your views.
The biggest fear for most people when this subject is approached, is that they are somehow inadequate. They feel threatened by something they do not fully comprehend. You will be greeted with something like, “Why am I not enough?”, or “Why do we need this, isn’t what we do satisfying to you?”. It is your answer to these types of inquiries that will set the tone for how your mate reacts to the entire notion of using Adult sex toys in your relationship.
Getting An Understanding
Often it is hard to communicate our desires, especially the ones that deal with sex. We do not want them to see us as “some kind of freak”, and we do not want to alienate our partners. Most people are uncomfortable with any talk that deals with sex and intimacy. Your partner needs to understand what your intentions are about the use of these sexual aids. They need assurances that you will respect their boundaries and what you want the two of you to gain from the experience. In order for the sex toys to be a pleasurable and healthy experience, honest communication between the two of you is a must.
Preparing For The Talk
As they say timing is everything, and with this conversation it has never been more of the truth. When and where you have this conversation is very important. The first thought many have is to try to bring it up when you are being intimate but this will invariably backfire on you. You should also not bring this subject up after you have had a tiff. It is also not to hold this type of conversation when either of you are having a stressful day, suffering from exhaustion or otherwise in a bad mood.
Conversations like this are not to be entered into lightly or in jest. conduct the conversation on neutral ground and in private. Once you and your partner have gotten past the first wherefores and whys, it is time for the two of you to set some ground rules and boundaries. Start introducing the smaller sex toys and as you both become more accustomed to the idea and more at ease with each other.
Make it a habit of choosing the toys together. You can shop for them from the comfort of your home and they are delivered to your door. Open them together, make a game of it, and make the opening of a new arrival an event. Be sure that you never rush the experience and use lubricant to avoid any abrasions or other discomfort. Forget the myth that only people of unsavory character and perverts use Adult sex toys, people from every facet of life is using sex aids to expand their sexual play.